I am not very good at starting things.
Probably because I am a perfectionist. I’m the type of person who hates trying new things because I’m afraid of not doing it right the first time. Empty journals fill a couple shelves of my bookcase due to my self-imposed idea that the opening entry should have fascinating, breath-taking, multi-million-dollar-movie-opening-line quality.
However, due to a desire to express, a drive to achieve, a dedication to better myself, and a little bit of peer pressure, I’ve finally bit the bullet and started this blog (after a month or two of trying to come up with just the right blog name. Hence, the name.)
I never understood it when people would tell me that they spent their college years “discovering who they were.” As a teenager, I couldn’t figure out how one didn’t know one’s identity. It seemed like a pretty easy thing to know.
“I am Emma. I am female, prone to emotional outbreaks and clumsiness. Hide your cereal and milk. My hobbies are X, Y, and Z. Do not ask me to repeat this message.”
Although now that I am 21 and halfway through a bachelor’s degree, I totally understand.
I found online personality tests.
Suddenly, the answers were all there! Why am I this way? What are my strengths? My weaknesses? My relationship tendencies? All of these questions (and more) were answered right on my computer screen. And alarmingly, every time I took a test, the results were always pretty accurate.
Apparently, I am a Type A. My Myers-Briggs type is ESTJ. My strengths in leadership are Individualization, Strategic, Competition, Includer, and Activator (go here for the full list of strengths and their descriptions).
I can’t get enough! I love to study personalities, and not just my own. After I discovered my Myers-Briggs type, I had all of my coworkers and boss take the exam too, just so I could analyze how they operate.
At the end of the day though, I guess it doesn’t really matter. I’m the only me there is, and that’s more than enough for this world to handle.